The question is not how we can “teach” an infant to move well and correctly, using cleverly thought up, artificially constructed, complicated measures, using exercises and gymnastics. It is simply a matter of offering an infant the opportunity – or, more precisely, not to deprive him of this opportunity – to move according to his inherent ability. –Dr. Emmi Pikler, 1940
I love countless things about motherhood, but one of the most remarkable is being able to witness up close the first year of a human's life. Even more stunning than the development itself is the fact that, most of the time, it happens in almost the same way for almost every human born. I believe that this blueprint we start out with can be trusted.
This is where Natural Gross Motor Development - a concept attributed to Dr. Emmi Pikler (of the famous Pikler's Triangle) - comes in. I didn't learn about it until my first baby was about a year old, thanks to Janet Lansbury. Like so many lightbulb parenting moments, when I first learned about Natural Gross Motor Development, I felt a sudden sense of clarity and alignment in my core. It clicked not just in the short term, but for my child's long term health.
What is Natural Gross Motor Development?
Pikler describes it herself here. One of my favorite people in the parenting space, Nicole Kavanaugh writes about it very practically here.
My interpretation of Natural Gross Motor Development stems from trust. Trust that our babies are not empty vessels we're meant to bestow our knowledge upon. They're brilliantly knowing, complex beings who we need to tend to and keep alive - a lot like plants. I liken my role as a parent to a gardener... trying to balance the right amount of sunlight, water, fertilizer, wind, etc. But I trust that a flower knows how to grow and bloom all on its own.
Of course, there are exceptions and developmental challenges that require intervention by no fault of the parents. Nature is anything but 100% predictable. My philosophical beliefs guide me, but if I ever have any concerns or something seems off, I don't hesitate to seek input from others.
But as a general rule, the more we interrupt and restrict our young babies' innate development plan (through the use of containers, seats, bouncers, walkers, etc), the more likely we are to negatively impact future milestones. And so months or years down the line, intervention is required because a foundational element was rushed or skipped altogether. We want bodies that are loose, balanced, and meeting developmental milestones - particularly ones like rolling and crawling.
Even without interventions like seats and bouncers, babies are sometimes naturally imbalanced or tight and need a little assistance. If you've ever described a newborn or young baby as "strong" because of how they're holding their necks up or are always trying to stand up early, it's likely because of tension that would benefit greatly from bodywork like chiroproactic or craniosacral therapy and evaluation for oral restrictions like tongue, lip, or buccal ties. It can feel overwhelming to research specialists and make the appointments, but if it's something you can handle, it's absolutely worthwhile. The younger the child, the easier it is to address these restrictions.
My Why
Like almost everything in my approach to parenting, what I spend time and energy on today is in service of my long term vision for my children. I commit to supporting Natural Gross Motor Development because I want my little kids to grow up to be adults who trust themselves, look inwards instead of out to know what they're capable of, and find joy in movement. Their sense of accomplishment and determination when they figure something out on their own has replaced my desire to feel pride in teaching them something.
Parenting is also just easier when you really trust your kids to try what they're ready for and to focus on self-mastery. I spend most of my time at the playground relaxing on a bench, admiring their confident and competent sense of adventure.
What does Natural Gross Motor Development look like in my home?
Important note you'll see me make over and over - nothing is more important than my connection with my kids. It can be so easy to learn about a new concept and prioritize adherence over presence. I was tempted to beat myself up about dramatically encouraging my oldest to crawl and putting him in a seat before he was ready. There are also times I can't prioritize freedom of movement because the risk is too high, or we just don't have time. After years of practice, I now spend 0% of my time feeling bad about these moments and try to embrace whatever opportunities we do have. Take what you want from this and leave the rest.
Newborn Stage:
We don't use swaddles or other restrictive clothing like socks or mittens (unless we're going outside in the cold, of course!).
Lots of snuggles and holding and soft carrier use - skin to skin and co-regulation in close proximity is a major building block in all development (thanks to more stable heart rate, temperature and blood pressure, increased oxygenation, and sense of security that allows for growth).
We minimize bucket carseat use outside of the car.
When not being held, I lay baby on their back as much as they'll tolerate, remembering not to favor one side (for example, if you lay them by a tree or window that might catch their attention, be sure to lay them in alternating directions so they move both ways).
Visiting a chiropractor or bodyworker trained in infant care soon after birth to address any uneven development or tension so they can develop with less restriction.
Tummy time simply by baby laying on my chest, singing and talking to each other.
Being mindful of which side I'm favoring while changing, laying down near windows or fans or other attractive objects so as not to encourage them to favor one side (torticollis can already be an issue at birth and is very treatable, especially early on!)
Making time to enjoy watching my infant move. Sitting close by and doing nothing but being present and offering a calm smile can feel hard at first, but is like a form of meditation. You'll start to notice the slightest changes, and witness your baby's small but mighty accomplishments.
Early Movers:
Once fed, changed, and happy, I start movement time on the back and let them go from there. This is the position that gives babies most range of motion and autonomy.
Dress for success! Limit socks and footed outfits. Skip dresses and skirts and any other bulky fabric outfits that will get in their way.
Don't always hand the baby whatever they're looking at or showing interest in - give them space and time to interact on their own... beginning to roll, shift, reach toward whatever object is catching their eye.
I love having small chairs, stools, pillows, etc for babies to pull themselves up on and to push around and map their movements in relation to other items. Having an area with a few items spread around gives them a chance to visually and then physically explore.
When working on rolling, I offer as little intervention as possible - letting them communicate a bit of frustration before helping if their arm is trapped (but I always help if they need it!).
I start talking to and narrating things for baby from birth (during pregnancy and labor, really), but I use their movements as a great opportunity for rich, sincere language. I'll try not to interrupt or distract them with my enthusiasm, but I might say "I think you're looking at that red ball... I know it's so far away! I can see you reeeeaching for it. You're stretching your arm so far. That looks like hard work. Wow - you got it! Does the ball feel squishy in your hands?"
Always: Making time to enjoy watching my baby move. Sitting close by and doing nothing but being present and offering a calm smile can feel hard at first, but is like a form of meditation. You'll start to notice the slightest changes, and witness your baby's small but mighty accomplishments.
Walking & Beyond
Remember that helping/instructing is almost never safer - stay close and spot them, but try your best not to intervene with a hand hold or by giving a lift. It's so helpful for them to get a sense of their own capabilities without assistance.
Try not to think too much about how YOU would do whatever they're doing - remember that your adult body is very different than theirs - sometimes head first IS safer when your body is only a bit taller than the step.
Prioritize barefoot time and use minimal, wide, and flexible sole shoes when necessary. I have used these sandals and these booties for all of my children (I had to replace the booties but the sandals have been handed down). Once they're super active and walking on riskier surfaces, I like the brand Ten Little.
I never place my kids somewhere - for example, at the top of a slide or climbing structure, or up on monkey bars. Sometimes this makes them frustrated, but I explain that until they're able to do it on their own, their bodies just aren't ready. This gives us an opportunity to talk about how different bodies are ready for different things, and that different families might have different rules, and that's okay.
I remind myself that faster is not better.
Always: Making time to enjoy watching my child move. Sitting close by and doing nothing but being present and offering a calm smile can feel hard at first, but is like a form of meditation. Witnessing your child go through the process of identifying a challenge, deciding to try it, working through any obstacles, making it to the other side, and then being overcome with pride is a gift. It's one of the greatest feelings in life.
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