The #1 advice I’d give anyone who’s pregnant is minimize time spent shopping for gear and setting up a nursery (that you’ll have to change basically as soon as they’re mobile) and to spend more time planning for a postpartum period that can include as much rest as possible. This is really hard in a culture with no infrastructure of quality postpartum care. And even harder when you don’t have good support close by.
I will work against the injustice of this forever, but in the meantime, here are some practical ideas to prepare for postpartum when you don't have the proverbial village.
SIMPLIFY.
Limit clothes, gear, and gadgets ruthlessly. Reduce decision making. Learning how to put it on. Laundry. It’s a brief time and the mental load of clothing logistics is massively underestimated Limit or get rid of clothes, gear, and gadgets - ruthlessly. Do not underestimate just how much effort and energy goes in to sorting, organizing, laundering, and making sense of things. It's incredibly common to have a drawer full of baby clothes but only use the same 2 or 3 outfits since they're easy to put on and you know they fit.
Babies turn in to mobile explorers very quickly, so take advantage of any pre-birth energy to clear out clutter. Set up donate, hand-me-down, and sell boxes so you can quickly get things out of circulation.
SET UP YOUR NEST(S)
Think about where in your home you'll spend most of your time in the first few days and weeks. You need proximity to a bathroom (with postpartum supplies) and somewhere to lay safely with baby and sleep, plus access to food and drink. Plan on avoiding stairs in the beginning as much as possible - so make an upstairs and downstairs nest if you can.
I have a detailed, fully linked Postpartum Nest resource guide you can get for FREE here.
Set up a basket with newborn diapers, wipes, a few towels or burp cloths, vitamins or supplements you want to have handy, plus a phone charging station, books, snacks, and anything else you might want.
BE DIRECT
This is the time to identify your needs and express them to people who want to help. If you’re going to have visitors, communicate what you think you’ll need most - a “Ways to Support“ note on the fridge is great!
My favorite way to facilitate support from afar is to work with a sibling or close friends to communicate. That might look like an email saying - "Thanks to a local second hand shop, they dont need much! But they're low on local support and really could use postpartum doula care, a meal delivery subscription, a double stroller, cleaning service, etc. so we're pooling gift money to support them in this really meaningful way!"
MAKE A FOOD & WATER PLAN
Plan ahead to ensure sufficient food and hydration each day - this is an area a partner or support person should OWN (even if you make the plan and delegate). This might look like your partner setting up 3 large reusable water bottles and electrolyte mixes each morning + one fresh bottle at night. Do the same with meals - talk about what a go-to breakfast should be and an approximate snack/meal schedule. Aim for nourishing, balanced meals, but also plan for basic survival, like inhaling trail mix in the middle of the night.
I like to put a list of really easy snacks, meals, and takeout ideas on the fridge so that anyone stopping by can handle without asking.
Meal prep parties so that you have nourishing meals frozen is a great baby shower alternative. My absolute favorite thing to recommend to clients (and I wish existed when I had my last baby!) is Mama Meals. Postpartum nourishment shipped frozen with the best ingredients out there. Great for pregnancy or post surgery healing, too. It's only free shipping in a few states, but if you make a large order, the price per serving ends up being pretty reasonable for the quality you're getting.
CREATE YOUR RESOURCE LIST
The postpartum brain is not supposed to DO anything. That's why showering, ordering toilet paper, sending an email, replying to a text message can feel like insurmountable tasks early on. Take care of future you by searching for a lactation specialist, oral restriction specialist, chiropractor, bodyworker, postpartum doula, pelvic floor PT, etc BEFORE baby arrives. Put the list of names and contact info on the fridge along with your own care provider, pediatrician, and emergency contacts.
Making an appointment at 2 days postpartum is hard enough - researching and decision making can be impossible.
HOUSEHOLD OPERATIONS
A few months out, as you move around your house and through life, start making notes of what it takes for things to run (relatively) smoothly. Toothpaste, TP, shampoo and conditioner, trash bags, cat litter, contact lenses, dishwasher and laundry detergent...
Stock up on what you can ahead of baby's arrival to give yourself as much buffer as possible. If you have older kids, think through the pickups and drop-offs, snack days, and camp sign ups ahead and see if there's anything you can do to make it easier on future you.
HIRE A POSTPARTUM DOULA
No explanation really needed - if you can make it work financially, do it! Not only will you get the individualized care you deserve, but they'll likely help you prepare for postpartum more strategically than you might on your own.
Kommentare